You’ve set up your trust. You’ve named your trustee.
But how will they know what you really wanted?

Enter the Letter of Wishes—an informal but powerful document that allows you to speak beyond the legal language of the trust deed. It’s your personal message to the trustee, guiding them on how to care for your family, protect your legacy, and honor your values.

Though not legally binding, it is often treated with great respect—especially by professional trustees.

What Is a Letter of Wishes?

A Letter of Wishes is a private, written document that accompanies your trust. It outlines your intentions, preferences, and values—but doesn’t override the trust deed.

Think of it as a moral compass for your trustee, especially in a discretionary trust, where they have leeway to decide who gets what, when, and how.

Why It Matters

Without guidance, even the most competent trustee may face dilemmas like:
- Should I give your child a lump sum… or staggered payments?
- What should I prioritize—education, housing, or healthcare?
- How do I balance fairness between stepchildren or multiple generations?
- Should I support a beneficiary struggling with addiction or debt?

Your Letter of Wishes helps answer these questions—without locking the trustee’s hands legally.

What Can You Include?

Your Letter of Wishes is flexible, but commonly includes:
- The purpose of the trust
- Your priorities (e.g., education, home ownership, long-term security)
- Specific guidance for beneficiaries with special needs or vulnerabilities
- How to treat unequal distributions fairly
- Suggestions for when to withhold or delay distributions
- Guidance on reinvesting, donating, or preserving certain assets
- Recommendations for successor trustees or family advisors

And because it’s informal, you can update it as often as you like, without needing to amend the legal trust deed.

Case Example: A Thoughtful Father

Mr. Harun set up a discretionary trust for his four children. One child had a history of reckless spending, another was a single mother with special financial needs.

In his Letter of Wishes, he asked the trustee to:
- Be cautious with distributions to the spender
- Prioritize long-term stability for the single mother
- Offer milestone-based disbursements (e.g., completing a degree, buying a home)
- Remind the children that the trust reflects his hope for family unity—not entitlement

The trustee followed these principles, and the family not only avoided conflict—they felt cared for, even after his passing.

Final Thought

A trust outlines the what.
A Letter of Wishes explains the why.

It adds soul to your structure. Compassion to your compliance.
And it may be the single most human element in your entire estate plan.

Coming up next:
“Could You Have Created ...a Sham Trust?”
Find out what makes a trust legally valid—and how to avoid the common mistakes that can destroy your plan.